As a child going to the video store to rent movies for the weekend, I always immediately ran to either the kids section or the wrestling section. I just wasn’t really interested in anything else. What 6 or 7 year old kid is gonna watch a drama or be allowed to watch the good action movies or a horror movie? At least, that’s how it was for me, though I’ve heard tales of the other kids being allowed to watch pretty much anything they wanted to…
I’ll tell you this right now though, I wasn’t above snooping around the rest of the store, taking a look at what else was out there. For a young boy, some of those VHS covers I saw while checking out the rentals at Curtis Mathes, Phar-Mor or Hills were down right scintillating! Low budget action & horror movies always had the best covers. They were cheesy, yes, but they were also filled with mindless T&A. The kind of stuff that made me feel “funny”. Again, at least, that’s how it was for me.
The horror movie box art, of course, freaked me out yet I couldn’t look away. They were gory and violent, but they had girls with huge boobies in their bra & panties! I was just another young man who had succumbed to the combination sex & violence. But as for those sex comedies, hey, the exploitation was all in good fun!
Join me, and let us take a look at some of the low-budget cheese and T&A of 80s VHS box art.
The Slumber Party Massacre (1982)
‘The Ultimate Driller Killer Thriller’ doesn’t have time for subtlety (or originality, going by the title): “My, what a big drill you have pointed at my heaving bosom, Mr. Killer!”
I’ve seen TONS of 80s slasher movies, big & small, and this is probably one of the more popular ones of the C-movie variety. Perhaps it’s time I watch it…
Slumber Party Massacre II (1987)
“That’s not a drill. THIS is a drill!”
I’m actually tempted to put this on my Netflix list just so I can see that wicked drill-tar in motion.
School Spirit (1985)
This cover sums up exactly what I would be doing if I was able to roam the earth in ghostly form. Nothing wrong with a little “sneak a peek” in the girls’ locker room. Funny, at the video store I worked at, our copy of the VHS case was exactly just as much faded as this one.
And get this– one of the listed production companies for this movie is called ‘T&A Productions’.
SS Girls (1977)
Okay, this Italian movie wasn’t released in the 80s, but this particular VHS release of it by Media was.
Can someone tell me what the HECK is up with Nazi sexploitation films? I guess the idea is to shock and offend as much as possible? Will some scumbag give us an al-Qaeda Girls to follow up with?
Girls School Screamers (1986)
“Your dirty panties or your life!”
A Troma film! And you know, Troma means quality.
Hot Chili (1985)
Ah, a good looking girl in a scene that’s actually a bit pleasant. Yessir, nothing wrong with a beautiful blonde in a bikini… although the four guys hiding in the bushes ogling her is a bit creepy.
I’m really hoping this girl’s name is Chili because I’d like to imagine the movie’s tagline is:
“Everyone wants a taste of… Hot Chili.“
Hot Resort (1985)
Hey, look, another “Hot” movie! And more ogling! And Bronson Pinchot! I bet these dudes are gonna pull the ol’ “splash water on her back” trick to check out the goods up front.
