MAN OF STEEL, SPRING BREAKERS, EVIL DEAD and THE CABIN IN THE WOODS. I have opinions.

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Evil Dead
2013, TriStar Pictures

Not a lot to say about this one other than “eh”. I rented it out of boredom and was kinda bored by watching it. There’s a number of moments that stay true to the original classic but this remake/reboot/re-imagining/whatever was presented with a lot less humor. So, yeah, take out the sense of humor the original had and take away the likable character of Bruce Campbell’s Ash and this is what you’re left with. At least the ending is completely gory and over-the-top to the point where it is being very silly. That’s about the only time it captured the spirit of the original.

It’s already been announced that there will be an Evil Dead 2. At the same time, Sam Raimi is planning on getting to work on writing Army of Darkness 2. Ultimately, the plan is produce a seventh and final Dead movie that teams up the characters of Ash and Mia. That actually sounds kinda cool but I’d be perfectly fine if all we got was a new Bruce Campbell/Ash movie.

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Spring Breakers
2013, A24 Films

Okay, the obvious reason to watch this movie is because the girls are young, hot and they spend most of the movie running around in bikinis. I can admit that. That is the entire reason I bothered to watch it. But is there a greater reward? Could it be there’s an entertaining story with a deeper message?

Nah. Not really. Spring Breakers has been mislabeled and misrepresented as comedy/drama. I would call it a crime drama myself. The only thing about the movie that is even mildly comedic is James Franco playing a south Florida rapper/drug dealer. But he’s so convincing that the point-and-laugh novelty of that wears off and he quickly becomes the most compelling character in the movie. The female characters are what you’d expect: nutty bimbo party whores with mean-streaks. So, basically any college chick.

It’s really not worth watching. I ended up sitting through the whole thing late one night out of boredom but 20 minutes into it I knew I wasn’t going to like it. It’s boring and depressing. I guess I’ll sit through anything for a look at boobs. Just a tip though, if you’re thinking you’re going to see the former Disney princesses in the buff, you aren’t. Selena Gomez and Vanessa Hudgens are in bikinis but the nudity does not come from any of the four female leads. Bare breasts are supplied by the random strippers and spring breakers that are in the film.

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The Cabin In the Woods
2012, Lionsgate Films

This one I had debated over watching a long time ago but passed on it as I thought it was going to be your typical overly gory & realistic modern horror movie. As I get older, I’m less and less willing to watch horror movies unless it pertains to classic genres and characters like slasher movies, zombies, Dracula, etc. The best cabin horror film was, is and always will be the The Evil Dead (the original) and I admit I thought The Cabin In the Woods was going to be just another ripoff. Luckily, it’s waaaaaaaaaaaaaay different. Yes, there are cliches here but it’s all done in a satirical fashion just as Scream was done all those years ago.

I won’t bother recapping the plot but I thought it was genius and wished we could’ve seen even more of the facility and all of those monsters in action. It seems like maybe this movie came and went without much notice, despite good reviews. That’s a shame. Reviews I’ve seen for it hyped it as something that was going to change the way horror films were made, just like Scream did. I don’t feel like that happened but if you’re wanting something different and something that dares to make a horror movie fun again, this is it.

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Man of Steel
2013, Warner Bros. Pictures

I finally got to see this movie after weeks and weeks of avoiding spoilers and seeing there was much controversy about this movie online as to whether it either awesome or sucked. I’m leaning towards awesome. The tone is similar to Nolna’s Dark Knight Trilogy. It’s got a lot of somber, serious moments but there’s still an undercurrent of hope attached to it. Personally, I think a Superman movie should be lighter and brighter (something closer to Avengers but maybe not as comedic) but I still really enjoyed this movie.

***SPOILERS***SPOILERS***SPOILERS*** coming up right now.

I’m fine with Superman snapping Zod’s neck. I know some people think “Superman doesn’t kill” and they are right but it was such an extreme circumstance, I’m okay with it. Sure, he could held onto Zod and flown UP to prevent Zod’s heat vision from killing that family, but they were going for emotion in that scene. So I don’t have much of a problem with it.

As for Clark letting Jonathan Kent die just so he wouldn’t reveal himself/his powers to the world… yeah. I can see why people gripe about that. Keeping his identity is important but Superman does whatever it takes to SAVE lives. He wouldn’t just let someone die, especially his dad, just because “the world isn’t ready”. That was kinda dumb, but we could chalk it up to youth, inexperience and following the wishes of a parent. Maybe they could play that up with the next movie, filling Clark with guilt and regret.

The first part of the movie was like a scifi/drama. A bit slow but it was still good. The second half of the movie becomes SMASH! CRASH! BASH! EXPLOSIONS! and doesn’t let up until the very end. The destruction is almost too much, in my opinion, and again we see Superman with little regard for others. There’s so much destruction going on and never once does Superman stop to save a child, old lady or a cat from the very buildings he made fall. It’s just punch, punch, punch. I can’t even imagine the death toll during his fight with Zod. That’s something else I think they should play up in the next movie — Superman being careless. Sure, he can fight but he needs to learn how to protect.

I had my doubts about Amy Adams as Lois Lane and I can say those doubts were well-founded. She is just not a Lois Lane. She’s too soft and sweet and that’s not Lois. Lois is a brash, short-tempered ball-breaker. Amy can’t pull that off. Henry Cavill, on the other hand, is a great choice for Superman. I’d like to see more moments of him as Clark Kent in the Daily Planet with the next movie but he may be my favorite Superman yet. He is the most physically accurate actor to play him, I think.

So, yeah, the movie isn’t perfect and despite my gripes I think it was very good. I really loved the opening of the movie with Jor-El as Krypton. I’m not the only person who thinks this but they should absolutely do a prequel set on Krypton starring Russell Crowe as Jor-El. It was that good. I almost didn’t even want to get into the Superman stuff, I wanted to see more of Crowe fighting Zod’s goons on Krypton.

So they are saying a Superman/Batman movie is up next and will serve as the sequel to Man of Steel. That’s a bad idea, in my opinion. They just had this great Superman movie and now they want to do some crossover with Batman where they are going to have to introduced a new actor and new take on Batman? It sounds like a recipe for distaste but we’ll see. I wish they would let Superman find its footing a bit more. My preference would be a Man of Steel sequel before we get to him teaming up (or against) Batman. Hopefully Supes will get a stand alone movie again at some point but I’m afraid it will be awhile since after the Batman team-up there’s supposed to be a Justice League movie.

Now, I really think it’s time to start posting about old cereals again.

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